The familiar unfamiliar - Culture vs Homosexuality

‘The Manusmriti equates homosexual sex to a man having sex with a menstruating woman or having sex during the day, and the punishment involves purification rites: bathing with clothes on, and fasting for a night, and eating specific cow milk and urine related products. Failure to purify can result in loss of caste. The crimes of heterosexual adultery and rape, and deflowering a virgin, have much higher fines and more intense purification rituals. (XI:175)’

I have grown up in a highly privileged orthodox Bihari family with strict rules and stricter gender norms. At a very young age I realized that something is different in me which made me stand out of the crowd. Growing up gay has its own set of challenges which unfortunately is not acknowledged by the majority of people and homosexuality still remains a taboo topic in society. Looking back to the earlier times and comparing it with today’s situation would be stupid because though the world is getting inclusive each passing day, the challenges of being a rainbow child in the family never get better. Decriminalization of section 377 in the year 2018 was a major step towards a positive change in the lives of the LGBTQ+ community but unfortunately does not ensure their safety and discrimination by the society which looks at them with utmost disgust and shame.

Human society in the South East Asian nations are based on two things: Honour and Shame. When it comes to honor, people don’t hesitate to kill their own children to protect it whereas when shame enters the chat, disowning a child and breaking all the bonds is not considered twice. Honor and shame, are the two pillars on which everyone’s life depends here. The whole idea of honor and shame is again connected to religion and culture. The culture which we take a lot of pride in, the religion which we consider the best amongst others is exclusive to those who follow the written rules of the handful of dominant patriarchs who refused to embrace diversity. They made rules according to their will and included everything which benefited them.

 When we speak of Hinduism, which is the religion of the majority of people of India, it is important to know that it has been codified in a certain way which has restraint the true essence of the religion and has merely brought it down to the four walls of a shrine and has whitewashed the majority of the myths and anecdotes. This ‘whitewashing’ is what I and most of the people interested in religion, sexuality and gender studies are against. When we do an in-depth study of the religion, we will find many stories where sexuality, gender, and sex have been discussed openly without any hesitation. Not only stories but even the early Indian history before the British and the Mughal invasion also had a much open-minded society which lets women and effeminate men seek pleasure without any judgments or criticism. This shows that Kama (sexual desire) was considered to be a part of the four human goals of life. The sculptures in Khajuraho temples of Madhya Pradesh built by the rulers of the Chandela dynasty are a great example of India’s liberal past. The Virupaksha temple of Karnataka, the Konark sun temple, Lingraja temple in Bubneshwar and many other architecture wonders represent India’s easy-going liberal past. Women are shown seeking pleasure, homoerotic intercourse and orgies are clearly visible.

In Hindu mythology, we see gods and goddesses taking a form of the opposite gender and many a time, even having a child! During the infamous Amritmanthan when the sweet nectar of immortality gets in the hands of the asuras, Vishnu takes the form of Mohini, a beautiful celestial woman exceptionally talented in nritya sangeet. Mohini successfully flirts with the asurs and is able to get the nectar of immortality from them. She again appears to save Shiva from bhasmasur. Vishnu successfully saves him in the form of Mohini but Shiva falls head over heels for her and him and Mohini end up copulating and giving birth to a child called Ayyappan, who is worshiped in the Deccan region of the subcontinent. (the god associated with the Sabrimala temple).  

Let alone these stories, in Hinduism, there is a goddess dedicated and worshipped by the transgender women (Hijras) called ‘Bahuchar mata’ who rides a rooster. The legend goes that a young bride discovers that her husband – who never comes to her room at night, instead riding out his horse is homosexual. Furious that he tricked her into a false marriage that will ruin her life, she turns into a goddess, punishes her husband and offers him salvation from worldly bondage only if he becomes a hijra and serves her. This also shows a kind of transaction between the transgender community and the normal straight society.
 A more realistic character would be of Shikhindi from the epic Mahabharata. She was raised as a boy and later on Arjun used Shikhindi as a shield and was able to kill Bhishma. She was a woman in her last birth and a divine voice told Drupad to raise her like a son. He trained her in warfare and even arranged a female to marry her. On the wedding night when her wife came to know the truth, she insulted her but later on Shikhindi changed her sex with a yaksha.

These are some of the many instances where we see the existence of the queer folks in the history and mythology of India and Hinduism. Calling it ‘unnatural’, ‘against the culture’ or even ‘wrong’ is highly incorrect. The only way to fight this kind of ignorance is education. It is important for us to question these human-made norms and customs and try to bring a change in society because, at the end of the day, these norms are made by humans only and can be changed by us.

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Following are some books which you can read to get more knowledge about the information which I have mentioned above :

1) Devdutt Pattanaik's Shikhindi and other tales they don't tell you
2) 7 secrets of the goddess by Devdutt Pattanaik 
3) 7 secrets of Shiva by Devdutt Pattanaik 

Please feel free to mail me at thelegalnomad1101@gmail.com regarding any other sources, materials, and suggestions.

Harsh Aditya